When things get too free

I will be looking back at time. Going through all the photos I have taken, all the blogs and tweets and musics I have listened. It seems like I have grown, changed, but by how much? I have no idea myself.

But most importantly I know that the change improves me, I can now think further and make better decisions in my life. I am glad.

Although I may have changed in a certain ways, but I am still me, the old me where I actually still have some weaknesses that I think it is very hard to get rid off.

I still forget stuff, like the keys when leaving home. I always had to run back into my room to get my keys when I realize I don't have it to lock the doors outside.

I still stuck with computer games. An addiction that I can never get rid off since I was born. From Prehistoric Game, Puzzle Bubbles, Prince of Persia, Rich 3, Chips Challenge, Reko 3, to Half Life: Counter Strike, Maple Story, Grand Theft Autos, Call of Duties, Battlefield 3, I am still that kid, who play games until I forget to eat or sleep. But nowadays I know how to control myself better, knowing that when its time to study, I will study. When its time to eat or sleep, I will do that. When friends jio go out eat or play, I will choose that, rather than last time I actually choose to stay at home with my games. Damn, how stupid and crazy was I last time.

Opthalmology finals on Monday. I think I better focus on that now. Fun can wait until after that.

Fun eh.. Fun at London, Edinburgh, Dundee, Amsterdam, Brugge, Ghent and Brussels... Starting on 18th. Hehehe..

Photoblog

With the new camera in hand, well not very new, but that piece of thing is still in warranty, I'm more towards on photoblogging from now on. Check out my photoblog at

http://clonidine.tumblr.com

Cheers

Its already October

Its October 2010, class started since a month ago.

I'm in this new apartment, with Jasper. I never thought at all that I will be living with him in my coming medical years.

Holidays

Its been so fast and I am already on 24th of July right now, which means that I have already enjoyed a month plus of summer holidays back in Msia.

Well.. Just to summerize the things I have did and remembered for the past few months

1. Bought my DSLR D5000 (well this is the first thing that came into my mind lol)
2. Changed my phone to Nokia 5800. My W800i had been serving me well and she deserves a good retirement.
3. Had alot of great time with family.
4. Had alot alot of outings with all my friends. Yumcha, Movies, Sports, Eating, Drinking. Ah but no clubbing, fuck! =P
5. Went to KL, Ipoh
6. Learnt photography and golf :D
7. 5s and 4 in exams for my second sem in my 2nd year
8. Shopped clothes and foodstuff to bring back to Moscow.
9. Maybe alot more, but I don't remember them.

List is not in order with time though.

I'm waiting for China missions.

Little Update

For someone who is evil, who has a thought of want to come to my house in M'sia to steal stuff, beware.

They will bite your heads off before u even be able to reach the door or windows of my house.

Microbs Tomorrow

Its Microbs exam tomorrow, and yea,

Microb Microb Microb Microb Microb

all night long.

Somehow suddenly I wondered,

wow, I'm studying quite hard now, for what?

A full mark in tomorrow's exam? Thats all?

Nope, I'm aiming not only the full mark, but the satisfaction of the victory I will get later.

It just feels great when you know that all your hard work pays off.

HELL YEAH..

But I dont know why I've been thinking more than this tonight. I'm starting to imagine things that will happen further than tomorrow, or the day after tomorrow, or this week, or this month..

Big house, big cars, great workspace...

and yea, of course, a wonderful wife, and cute childrens..

I grinned..

Microbs

Ah.. I'm late for prayer meeting tonight..

Been eye-ing myself on Microb book for some time already, until I didn't realize time had already went passed 10 o'clock.

It should be me who will be sharing tonight, but Chia Zhen told me that he will replace me up for today so that I can focus more on my upcoming exams.

Thanks Zhen! I owe you one! =)

Our Lifetime

My Mom

a touching story........... 

My mom only had one eye. I hated her... She was such an embarrassment. She cooked for students and teachers to support the family.

There was this one day during elementary school where my mom came to say hello to me. I was so embarrassed.

How could she do this to me? I ignored her, threw her a hateful look and ran out. The next day at school one of my classmates said, "EEEE, your mom only has one eye!"

I wanted to bury myself. I also wanted my mom to just disappear. I confronted her that day and said, " If you're only gonna make me a laughing stock, why don't you just die?"

My mom did not respond... I didn't even stop to think for a second about what I had said, because I was full of anger. I was oblivious to her feelings.

I wanted out of that house, and have nothing to do with her. So I studied real hard, got a chance to go abroad to study.. 

Then, I got married. I bought a house of my own. I had kids of my own. I was happy with my life, my kids and the comforts. Then one day, my Mother came to visit me. She hadn't seen me in years and she didn't even meet her grandchildren.

When she stood by the door, my children laughed at her, and I yelled at her for coming over uninvited. I screamed at her, "How dare you come to my house and scare my children!" GET OUT OF HERE! NOW!!!"

And to this, my mother quietly answered, "Oh, I'm so sorry. I may have gotten the wrong address," and she disappeared out of sight. 

One day, a letter regarding a school reunion came to my house. So I lied to my wife that I was going on a business trip. After the reunion, I went to the old shack just out of curiosity.

My neighbors said that she died. I did not shed a single tear. They handed me a letter that she had wanted me to have.

-------------------------------------------------------------------
"My dearest son,

I think of you all the time. I'm sorry that I came to your house and scared your children. 

I was so glad when I heard you were coming for the reunion. But I may not be able to even get out of bed to see you. I'm sorry that I was a constant embarrassment to you when you were growing up.

You see........when you were very little, you got into an accident, and lost your eye. As a mother, I couldn't stand watching you having to grow up with one eye. So I gave you mine.

I was so proud of my son who was seeing a whole new world for me, in my place, with that eye.

With all my love to you,

Your mother.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 
Always tell someone that you love them because you never know what day will be their last, or your own.

Always seek to resolve your problems or disagreements with loved ones because if either of you should pass on before, the one who is left alive will have the rest of their life to ponder those unresolved feelings but will never find closure. And closure usually brings Peace...

"I asked God, 'How do I get the best out of life?' God said, 'Face your past without regrets. Handle your present with confidence. And prepare for the future without fear!'",